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The Wit of the Marx Brothers
Chico's billing plan (from Animal Crackers):
    Mrs. Rittenhouse (Margaret Dumont): You are one of the musicians? But you were not due until tomorrow.
    Signor Emanuel Ravelli (Chico): Couldn't come tomorrow. That's too quick.
    Captain Spaulding (Groucho): Say, you're lucky they didn't come yesterday.
    Ravelli: We were busy yesterday, but we charge just the same.
    Spaulding: This is better than exploring. What do you fellows get an hour?
    Ravelli: Ah, for playing we getta ten dollars an hour.
    Spaulding: I see. What do you get for not playing?
    Ravelli: Twelve dollars an hour.
    Spaulding: Well, clip me off a piece of that.
    Ravelli: Now... for rehearsing, we make a special rate, that'sa fifteen dollars an hour.
    Spaulding: That's for rehearsing.
    Ravelli: That'sa for rehearsing.
    Spaulding: And what do you get for not rehearsing?
    Ravelli: You couldn't afford it.You see if we don't rehearse we don't play. And if we don't play, that runs into money. . . . Well, let's see how we stand. . . . Yesterday we didn't come. You remember yesterday we didn't come.
    Spaulding: Oh, I remember.
    Ravelli: That's three hundred dollars.
    Spaulding: Yesterday you didn't come, that's three hundred dollars.
    Ravelli: Yes, three hundred dollars.
    Spaulding: Well, that's reasonable. I can see that, alright.
    Ravelli: Now today we did come, that's -
    Spaulding: That's a hundred you owe us.
    Ravelli: Hey, I bet I'm gonna lose on the deal.